Everyday I talk to someone about what they want to do, and what is truly holding them back from it.
Over the years I have come to realize most people are so in fear of failure that it blocks them from ever achieving the success they desire in any aspect they choose.
The big problem though for many people, myself included is to flood light the issue and make it bigger than it really is.
This has lead me to go about fear in a different way, and not always do the traditional goal setting exercises.
Its called the fear setting exercise and its quite simple and highly effective.
There are 3 steps to this exercise and once you are done with it, you will realize that there are very little risks or issues that are stopping you from the actions needed to achieve the desired success.
So for the exercise, I will be using the example of competing in a body transformation contest – think a bodybuilding/figure show.
Ask yourself – What is the worst thing that could happen if I do this? (Use the absolute worst things that may happen, that you can think of)
for our example this may be
– Not being able to eat the treats I love daily
– Having to spend more time in the gym
– Not seeing some of my friends as much
– More daily stress
– Losing friends due to not similar interest
Ask yourself – What can I do to minimize the likelihood of these worst possible things actually happening?
for our example this may be
– Figuring out my diet to allow myself to get some of the treats I like over the course of the prep period
– Hire someone to help maximize the effectiveness and efficiency of my training to allow the most optimal results in the minimum amount of time
– Engage my friends to join me, or do activities together
– Reduce stress by planning out my day, and ensuring that everything is figured out in advance so daily stress is reduced
– Trying to have friends engage and enjoy the new interest and share the enjoyment with them
Now that you know the absolute worst things that can happen, as well as how to minimize the likelihood of them happening, ask yourself – If the worst did happen, what would I do to get back to where I currently am at?
For the example this may be
– Revert back to my current eating habits or slightly adjusted ones
– Reduce my training time
– Hang out with friends
– release stress by getting rid some things off my plate
– Re-engage with my social circle and common interests
As I said earlier, once you go through this exercise with anything that may be holding you back due to fear, you will realize that there is very little risk in stepping out past the fear because you have a solid plan laid out that includes; knowing the worst things that could happen, how to overcome the possible problems, and how to get back to where you currently are if all else fails.
Now take a few minutes, and try it out for yourself
Here are a few fears that I commonly talk to others about that may spark something for you:
-Changing a job
-Struggling with what their friends might think/say when they achieve their goals
-Creating own business
-Losing weight/Gaining weight
-Getting ready for a show
-Trying out for a sports team
-Asking for a raise
– Starting a new nutrition plan
-Going on a date with someone your interested in
-Trying out for an audition
– Going to the gym
Or anything else you can think of, try it out and see how much your flood lighting your fears and making them much bigger and scarier than they truly are!
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